Hold On

Has anyone else ever felt forgotten? Unimportant? Useless? Story. Of. My. Life. I think everyone gets that feeling every once in a while, but thankfully we have a wonderful God above us who comforts us in times like these, and if you put your trust in Him, you will be blessed. As it says in Psalm 28:7 "The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped; Therefore my heart greatly rejoices, And with my song I will praise Him." One of my favorite songs when I'm feeling down is a song by 33 Miles called "Hold On" 

This song is one that reminds us that God is with us, and we can cry out to Him at any time and He will come running to us. We just have to HOLD ON. 

I remember before I asked Jesus into my heart, I used to get this feeling of emptiness all the time. Has anyone else ever felt that? I'm sure I'm not the only one. I would get upset over the smallest things, and along with the feelings described above, I would just feel completely worthless. I still feel that way sometimes, but that's okay. When I was younger I was moved around from my mom and dad a lot. They separated when I was just a little girl. If something didn't go right at moms house, I wanted to go live with dad and vice-versa. I was constantly running away from my problems and not facing them like I should have done. A lot of things happened in the middle of all of this as well, things I will share later on.. But long story, short, I didn't have the best childhood. There are a lot of things that I don't remember when I was younger because my mind has completely blocked them out. I don't remember exactly how it happened but when I was in 8th grade I came to live in New Bern with my grandparents... This was probably one of the hardest thing I had ever had to do. I went from being able to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted to do it, to the complete opposite. At the beginning of my freshman year of high school, I got this boyfriend... We thought we were gonna be together forever and were completely un-seperable. I made choices during that relationship that I still to this day regret. After about a year and a half, we decided it would be best we went our separate ways. We were two completely different people with completely different personalities that clashed all the time. Through all of this, God did great things in my life. After the relationship ended, the summer after my Sophomore year, I started going to youth group more and more and became friends with the people in it. The youth group was getting ready to go on a mission trip to Toronto, Canada and I never got involved in wanting to go until about the week before we left. It wasn't something where I was like "God wants me to go in this trip, so I'm gonna follow his command and do it." Ha. No. It was more of an "escape" than anything. I was broken inside and I wanted to get away. While we were there, we worked with the homeless... We were broken up into two different groups and served in soup kitchens for the week. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. The people we met were all just so friendly and nice and all they wanted was to have someone listen to them. So I listened. Sometimes it got boring, and sometimes they would tell you the same stuff over and over and over again. But seeing a smiling face meant the world to them. That week, God got a hold of me. I don't know how He did it nor do I know the exact moment that got me but He did works in my life. When we got back from our mission trip I was just completely on fire for the Lord. What stuck with me the most when we got home was the statement said: "Don't let the mission trip end here in Canada, we have people hurting in our own home town that just want someone to listen to them." And that is so true... there are broken people everywhere and it's amazing what simple acts of kindness can do for them. We started a program shortly after we came home that summer called Unity Missions where we provide meals and clothing for the homeless, and needy. The ministry is held in the fellowship hall in the basement of our church. We started off with about 5 people, then 12, people and then 30 people and the ministry has just grown so much in the past year. We have volunteers that come out every week on Monday and Thursday nights to help cook, serve, and to just listen to the hearts of the people who come and it is just SO amazing to watch how God works through this. I also went on a mission trip to Mexico in April of this year, and I've just really felt God pulling at my heart for the past few months. As I said in my last blog, I believe that missions is my calling and I couldn't imagine myself doing anything in my future that wasn't completely centered around God. I lost many friends through the changes that I made in my life, and gave up a lot of things. However, I know that God is gonna use me through everything that has happened, and I know that He has great plans for my life and that "those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." (Isaiah 40:31) I'm not perfect, and I still make mistakes but God has done incredible things in my life and I just want to be completely souled out for Him. So, my question is: Why not give Him control of your life too, and watch as he does amazing things? I challenge you to just lay down all of your problems at God's feet and surrender your will to His and allow Him to transform you into what He has for you to do and to be.

Your Love Never Fails

Wow, I've had such a busy summer so far, I haven't even had time for any blogging. Well I just got home from a World Changers project in Rock Hill, South Carolina, and can I just say... God is SO GOOD! At the beginning of the week all I could think about is how much I wanted to go home. I was disappointed in some people, I really didn't like my crew, I felt like I didn't fit in... and just pretty much anything that could have possibly went wrong, did. However, I just had to continue to remind myself that God had a reason for me being where I was and being in the crew I was in and that is was in no shape or form an accident. It turned out to be in awesome week and I know that God worked in my heart, and many others. The worship was amazing, the messages, the people, and just how welcoming the city of Rock Hill, South Carolina was. I consider myself very blessed to have been a part of that. Our theme this year was "Unless" and here are a few of the unless statements of the week: Unless we go, they won't know. Unless we help, they won't heal. Unless we share, they won't care. Unless we sit, they won't see. And my favorite... Unless we live for His glory, we are incomplete. And that is just so true. We are ALL called to be the hands and feet of God and to share His love with everyone around. And UNLESS we go, who will? My crew name was the "Lumber Rumblers" this year, and our task was to tear shingles off of a roof, put tar paper town (which was THE worst, by the way) and finally, re-shingle it. Soooo basically we were on a roof in 100 degree weather for about 8 hours total each day. It was hard work, and there were times when all I wanted to do was jump off and cry because the work was so hard and it was so hot. I told myself after the first day "Sarah, you are not going back on that roof, stay on the ground and help clean up or do something, but don't go back on the roof." I felt like I was arguing back and forth with God because I know that it was something He wanted me to do and something that would give me strength...but I didn't want to. Then that night at our Youth Group Devotion time we looked at the verse 1 Corinthians10:31 which says this: "Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." I wanted to slap myself in the face for being so selfish and just worrying about myself. The reason I went to World Changers was to grow closer in my walk with the Lord and to learn to Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart  and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." Yet all I was doing was arguing with God about how I didn't want to work on a roof.... I learned so much this week... One of the songs we sang was called "Your Love Never Fails" and the lyrics to this song just really spoke to me.. Nothing can separate even if I ran away, Your love never fails. I know I still make mistakes, but You have new mercies for me everyday, Your love never fails. You stay the same through the ages, Your love never changes. There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning, and when the oceans rage, I don't have to be afraid because I know that You love me. Your love never fails. God's love never fails, He loves us and we don't have to be afraid. Like the song says, even when we make mistakes, God still loves us and has new mercies for us every day. He worked miracles this week in the lives of some kids on our youth group, and I just pray that they will continue to seek Him in all that they do because: Unless God's in it, we don't want it. I've always felt as if I've been called into the mission field.. (Yes, I know everyone is called to be a witness for Christ) but we saw a map this week of all of the places in the world who haven't heard the gospel of Christ and it just shattered my heart into a million pieces. I couldn't imagine my life without my amazing, sovereign God. And I just want people every where to hear His Word, and I honestly feel that I'm being called to step out in to the world and be the hands and feet of God, and share his great love with everyone in the nations. I will go wherever HE wants me to go, and lose myself seeking His glory...God is infinitely worthy of glory! We were asked the question this week: "What is your treasure? What, if was taken away from you would just make you feel broken inside, and why?" Is it your family? Your friends? Remember, those are all blessings from the Lord and without Him we wouldn't have any of this. God should always be your number one treasure. So think about it.. What do YOU treasure most? 

"I'll stand with arms high and heart abandoned in awe of the One who gave it all. So I'll stand my soul Lord to You surrendered. All I am is Yours....."